Designer Relationships: A Guide To Happy Monogamy, Positive Polyamory, And Optimistic Open Relationships Download Free (EPUB, PDF)
Contemporary relationships are in a state of rapid evolution. These changes can and should empower people with the opportunity to develop partnerships based on their own sexualities, understandings, and agreements. This makes it possible to create what Kenneth Haslam, founder of the Kinsey Institute’s Polyamory Archive, has called “designer relationships.”Designer relationships may encompass: people who bond emotionally but not sexually; people who agree to be non-exclusive; single people who have occasional lovers or friends with benefits; multiple partner configurations where long-term bonds exist among all or some; partnerships in which people are kinky and that make room to explore kink.The possibilities are limitless, and thinking about a partnership as something people can craft allows for flexibility and change. Relationships can open and close or have varying degrees and kinds of openness as circumstances demand. In the context of a designer relationship, decisions are made mutually, consciously, and deliberately. Best-selling authors and nationally known relationship experts Patricia Johnson and Mark A. Michaels are exemplars of this life choice, and have studied polyamory for over 20 years. This book explains exactly how you and your loved ones can design your own life and love.
Paperback: 208 pages
Publisher: Cleis Press (September 8, 2015)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 1627781471
ISBN-13: 978-1627781473
Product Dimensions: 5 x 0.5 x 7.9 inches
Shipping Weight: 12.6 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
Average Customer Review: 4.7 out of 5 stars See all reviews (9 customer reviews)
Best Sellers Rank: #65,888 in Books (See Top 100 in Books) #1 in Books > Gay & Lesbian > Nonfiction > Sexuality #17 in Books > Religion & Spirituality > New Age & Spirituality > Sacred Sexuality #45 in Books > Politics & Social Sciences > Social Sciences > Specific Demographics > Gay & Lesbian
After reading their book "Partners in Passion," I was looking forward to reading "Designer Relationships: A Guide to Happy Monogamy, Positive Polyamory, and Optimistic Open Relationships"⦠and was delighted to find it living up to the same clear, loving, engaging voice that I have come to expect from Johnson and Michaels. Full of exercises and theory alike, Designer Relationships takes us on a journey through a wide variety of relationship dynamics helping every one of us explore not only what we want from relationships in general, but from the connections we have already. Going beyond open relationship theory, it takes us through the myths and misconceptions our culture has taught us, allowing each reader to face what they really want. Thank you Johnson and Michaels for waking us all up once more!
I have strongly recommended this book to people who attend the poly Meetups that I host, but this is not just another "how to do polyamory right" book. It's much more than that.This is a book that will help you to really think about, talk about, plan, and craft the meaningful, lasting, loving relationship YOU want -- whether it's monogamous, polyamorous, or any of the many other varieties of lovestyles that exist. Design the relationship that fits who you are, how you and your partner(s) want to live and love. And then make it stronger.A clearly, thoughtfully written guide written by two people whose expertise in the field I have admired for the past 16 years.I bought a copy for me, read it, and then bought copies for friends and family.
This slim book is inclusive and informative when it comes to discussing various relationship styles, spanning monogamy, non-monogamy, and everything in between. The common thread connecting them all is this idea of designer relationships: that people who consciously and intentionally choose to enter into relationships, with high degrees of honesty, transparency, and mutuality, can benefit from discussions of core values and cultural concepts dominating relationship discourse. Whether someone's choosing to be monogamous (which happens on a number of levels: practical, social, emotional, and sexual, or any combination thereof) or choosing to explore some facet of non-monogamy, the ideas in this book are widely applicable.Main topics include ways of defining designer relationships (again, the authors are very inclusive, of different gender identities, sexual orientations, relationship styles, and so on); critiquing pervasive cultural models of monogamy; dispelling stereotypes about non-monogamy and sex-negativity; and building blocks and tools for healthy relationships and sexual explorations. The authors have a good grasp on the literature on relationships and sexuality, and are very plugged into current concerns and debates about relationship models and sexuality.If other relationship exploration books like Opening Up or The Ethical Slut seem intimidating, or if you'd like to supplement the existing books on your shelf with something new and easily manageable, I highly recommend this book.
I love that this book is really inclusive and helpful to the entire spectrum of relationship models, and offers experience-based wisdom to figuring out how to create the loving life that's right for you. It's accessible and practical, with action-oriented ideas. And the basis of the book is that we can collaborate creatively with our partner(s) while fully embracing ourselves. Refreshing, quick read that addresses elements of polyamory and relationships rarely discussed all in one book.
This proved to be a wonderful read! It was short, yet thought provoking and provided some very useful tips and advice for my personal relationships. I have referred it to friends and even bought the book as a gift for someone.
A very robust overview of Open / Poly relationship concepts. Certainly eye-opening for people who haven't considered the options. Mark & Patricia don't endorse any way of relating over the other; they want to be sure everyone has thought about their choices, and are in the relationship model that works to best satisfy the inner self.They write: "You are the designer, along with your partner or partners, and it's up to you to create a relationship that works and to redesign it when and if appropriate. We invite you to move beyond the binary thinking that deems monogamy and various forms of consensual nonmonogamy to be irreconcilable opposites."It includes some good advice for keeping your relationship strong, which follows on their amazing Partners In Passion: A Guide to Great Sex, Emotional Intimacy and Long-term Love which I'd suggest is must-have reading for everyone in (or thinking of being in) a relationship. Ie: everyone!
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